SUBWAY DOUCHERY

SUBWAY DOUCHERY : Grease the pole!

Mmmmhmmm… Bringing back the faux hawk? Hell yeah! Although it doesn’t work with your hair type, you will use chemicals against the will of God to achieve the style! Gap Jeans? FUTCH YEAH! You fell into the Gap years ago and never saw one good reason to climb back out! The only way to complete this is to pop the top! For the following reasons:

1.) Show off the vague suggestion of fleshy muscle tone.

2.) It’s the perfect way to compliment the Black Eyed Peas Back-Up Keyboardist look you’re avidly cultivating. 

3.) The Clincher: Rub your greasy back all over the pole. So people on the train after the pole will touch your back grease and wonder, “Is this pole greasy? Nahhh… must just be the humidity…

… but it wasn’t humidity… it was your back grease. Thanks for looking out! 

*** Thanks to everyone’s favorite lady in the world, Beth Ann! From now on I won’t be touching anything on the subway! Let it loose & Keep on Douchin’ ***

Notes:

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   THINK I KNOW THIS GUY. RYAN IS THAT YOU??

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