SUBWAY DOUCHERY

SUBWAY DOUCHERY : Santa’s Lost Weekend 

- Listen here pal, Santa Claus does NOT fall off the wagon. He steps off the sleigh.  

- All I want for Christmas is a bottle of Early Times whiskey, a couple sandwiches, and my dignity. 

- I like having my slippers close by in case I get a hankering for some milk and cookies. *Santa then winked inappropriately* 

- Just can’t sleep with a shirt on… find it too constricting.

- How many times do I have to say it?!?!? LIGHTS OUT!!!

- If the next stop isn’t ‘North Pole - Santa’s Workshop Plaza’ … I’m fucked..

- Just slide your wish lists under my slippers, I’ll get to them in the morning.

- Tonight, to sit on Santa’s lap you have to be at least eighteen years of age and female.. or androgynous.  

- I’ve slid down chimney’s cleaner than this subway! But seriously F train, how we doin’ tonight? 

- Tim Allen is full of crap.

*** A big round of applause to Iaisha for sending in this holiday classic! Keep on Douchin’ *** 

Notes:

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5. markellison said: I don’t like the posts that are just homeless people catching some ZZZs.
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